BAD NEWS.
i'll readily admit that i didn't prepare for this test correctly. in fact, one could say that i didn't prepare at all. but really, these are just excuses. the fact is...i failed.
a person needs a 70% to move on to the next round of considerations here in lubbock. well, i fell just short with a 69%. i'm mad and ok at the same time. things are changing. i'm changing. lubbock looks differently than it did 2 years ago when i started this trip. i look differently than i did 2 years ago. i don't like failing. not only do i represent myself, i represent a group of people who have invested their lives into my rearing. they don't place pressure on me, but i do represent them in a way. so, by not preparing and not performing, i have let them down. they raised me better (to utter an old cliche).
now to decide the next step. denton is a serious consideration. i'm at the point where i need to be purposeful about my decisions. not just because someone has told me some trite junk like that. in fact, no one has said that to me. but because i'm tired of playing around. i don't need a bunch of accomplishments to prove myself to anyone. i need them to show myself that i'm not scared. to show myself that succeeding is ok. because i'm tired of living a college lifestyle. sorry to all of you still there. but i'm tired of class and work type stuff. i'm tired of the next cool thing. substance is what i seek. and books generically don't offer it anymore. be my witness Lord, i need You, to drive me, to push me, to woo me to where i am, where i am supposed to be. i've lost track of that somewhere around here. i now seek it. help me pray for it. he is infinitely big enough to hear all of us if he so chooses.
failure is discomforting. even if you know the reasons. i don't wish to experience it anytime soon again. hello resolve. good to see you again.
i'll readily admit that i didn't prepare for this test correctly. in fact, one could say that i didn't prepare at all. but really, these are just excuses. the fact is...i failed.
a person needs a 70% to move on to the next round of considerations here in lubbock. well, i fell just short with a 69%. i'm mad and ok at the same time. things are changing. i'm changing. lubbock looks differently than it did 2 years ago when i started this trip. i look differently than i did 2 years ago. i don't like failing. not only do i represent myself, i represent a group of people who have invested their lives into my rearing. they don't place pressure on me, but i do represent them in a way. so, by not preparing and not performing, i have let them down. they raised me better (to utter an old cliche).
now to decide the next step. denton is a serious consideration. i'm at the point where i need to be purposeful about my decisions. not just because someone has told me some trite junk like that. in fact, no one has said that to me. but because i'm tired of playing around. i don't need a bunch of accomplishments to prove myself to anyone. i need them to show myself that i'm not scared. to show myself that succeeding is ok. because i'm tired of living a college lifestyle. sorry to all of you still there. but i'm tired of class and work type stuff. i'm tired of the next cool thing. substance is what i seek. and books generically don't offer it anymore. be my witness Lord, i need You, to drive me, to push me, to woo me to where i am, where i am supposed to be. i've lost track of that somewhere around here. i now seek it. help me pray for it. he is infinitely big enough to hear all of us if he so chooses.
failure is discomforting. even if you know the reasons. i don't wish to experience it anytime soon again. hello resolve. good to see you again.
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